August 29, 2019 at 11:24PM by CWC As the poets Nazareth sang in the ’70s, love hurts and love scars (ooh, love hurts, ooh). Yes, getting rejected does not feel good. When you’re dating rejection is, unfortunately, just part of life. You’re not going to have a mutual connection with everyone. You gotta kiss a lot of frogs apparently (what happens when the frogs run out is what I want to know). That’s why knowing the difference between real intimacy and “instamacy” can be majorly helpful in keeping your expectations realistic, and making rejection sting a little less. Jill P. Weber, PhD, tells Psychology Today that it’s important to be aware if you are overly personalizing a connection with someone. Let it be known that I have literally never done this before in my life (LOL). I asked Dee Stacey, certified sexual health educator for Blume, to expand a little bit on how knowing intimacy versus “instamacy” can be beneficial. There are two key things to keep in mind: depth of connection and time. “Of course everyone is capable of having meaningful and deep conversations right off the bat, but true intimacy—a real sense of closeness—needs time,” she adds. ad_intervals[‘419453_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘419453_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’);}); } }, 100); She likens it to the difference between love and infatuation. “People experiencing infatuation often do feel a passion and a closeness, but it’s more of an obsession,” she says. “It might feel like they need to spend as much
Day: August 29, 2019
Generations have been pitted against one another for all of history, but it’s high time we learn to talk to each other
August 29, 2019 at 11:08PM by CWC Twice a week, I head to class with a cohort of graduate-level fiction students ranging from age 23 (that’s me!) up into the 80s. Most of the time, we talk about each other’s work with thoughtful compassion. Most of the time. Sometimes, powerfully-rendered stories penned by 20-somethings get written off as lacking in experience. As naïve, superficial, and wide-eyed. It’s not just a theme in literature workshops. Undermining the experiences of younger generations is endemic in everyday conversation, and has been throughout the course of history. According to a 2018 Medium article written by Jason Feifer, editor in chief of Entrepreneur, “Our earliest texts are littered with youth bashing. From 600 to 300 BC, texts of the ancient Greeks complain of children becoming tyrants, contradicting their parents and wolfing down the best treats at the table.” He goes on to explain that cultures have blamed people with fewer years to their name for destroying language and marital customs. Today, Millennials receive a hefty serving of condescension for eating their weight in avocado toast, “killing” the collective’s work ethic (and mayonnaise, fast-casual chain restaurants, and the American dream), and being notoriously “entitled.” Gen Z, too, are “aways on their phones,” charmed by instant gratification, and just generally, “snowflakes.” ad_intervals[‘386447_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘386447_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’);}); } }, 100); Generational divides have caused a rift between people that, in my opinion, is far wider than a difference in age truly merits. We
A dress rehearsal isn’t just for the stage—here’s what to do before a big change in your life
August 29, 2019 at 10:18PM by CWC In sixth grade, I begged my mom to buy me a laser pointer at Staples. Overnight, I become the best presenter among my peers. Not because the super-cool tool elevated my social status (it didn’t), but because the pointer made me want to rehearse my assignments beforehand. Middle school me was onto something. Recently, the The New York Times parenting section covered the anxiety-reducing results of giving a preschooler a dress rehearsal before the first day of school. But you don’t have to be between the ages of 5 and 13 to benefit from practicing major life moments. A career expert says the tactic works in every stage of life. “Our brains are very capable of handling a lot, but if you want to enjoy and to be productive in the experience, it really helps you brain to have less to focus on,” says Maggie Mistal, a career coach in New York City. The less we humans prepare ahead of time for something, the more “attention residue” we carry with us from moment to moment, says Mistal. The name for the plight is pretty self-explanatory, but the coach describes it as what happens when we shift our attention to quickly from one moment to the next. The lack of transition means that whatever happened five minutes ago might still be holding onto your attention, which doesn’t exactly grant you “presence.” Rehearsing is the anecdote. ad_intervals[‘419407_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘419407_div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-7435403-3’);}); }
How to conduct a New Moon ritual even your skeptical friends will be into
August 29, 2019 at 10:09PM by CWC Vegetarian tacos, rosé, and your most eccentric friend’s cauldron. The New Moon in Virgo got us talking, and I raised quite a few eyebrows when I revealed my go-to list for one… okay, five New Moon rituals. You know, as if I came into the office wearing my pointy black hat. But I’m from North Brooklyn, a borough that’s all tarot cards and tall girls with black hair and bangs. Trust me, when I say that it’s not weird, and it’s also not, like, hard. New Moon rituals are all about intention setting, starting fresh, and supplicating female bonding outside of a book club. Of course, I’m a novice when it comes to New Moon parties, unlike astrologer and all-things-moon expert Chani Nicholas, who’s running a workshop for the New Moon in Virgo. If you’re looking to summon the power of this New Moon in Virgo specifically, it’s a really good time to focus on purifying and organization. Note, please, that Virgo’s ruling power is Mercury. If it helps at all, please envision Sailor Mercury, the brainy blue-haired scout in Sailor Moon, to accurately depict this energy. What you want to do is create a little altar (could just be a space on your coffee table, I don’t judge). “An altar to this New Moon should comprise anything that symbolized what you are beginning, any symbol of knowledge, magic, or intuition, any communication devices that you want blessed, and any crystals related to
If you’ve ever dealt with armpit discoloration, we’ve got you—here’s how to deal
August 29, 2019 at 10:00PM by CWC I’ve heard a lot of complaints about deodorant over the past few years. “It doesn’t work,” “it’s sticky and gross,” and “it gets all over my clothes” are among the most common. But recently, two separate people brought an entirely new D.O. issue to my attention that I hadn’t heard before: The products they’d been using changed the color of their armpits. Underarm discoloration, as it turns out, is fairly common—it did, after all, happen to two people in my circle over the course of a month—and whatever you’re using to keep sweat and odor at bay could be to blame (the other option is a condition called acanthosis nigricans, which you can learn more about here). “Chemical irritation can be a significant factor for people who apply a lot of deodorants, antiperspirants, and perfumes, because these irritate the area, dry the skin, and promote a thickening of the dermis,” says board certified dermatopathologist, Gretchen Frieling, MD. “Many deodorants and antiperspirant sprays contain aluminum as an ingredient and can clog the pores, which causes further inflammation.” ad_intervals[‘419482_div-gpt-ad-7520022-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘419482_div-gpt-ad-7520022-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-7520022-3’);}); } }, 100); So irritation, generally, is the culprit here, and chemicals tend to be the main offenders. “Chemicals that dry the skin or clog the pores should be avoided,” says Dr. Frieling. “Opt for natural deodorants that won’t add a layer of material to your skin that seals it in.” She adds that our skin (especially
The surprising ways sugar could mess with your gut
August 29, 2019 at 09:23PM by CWC When it comes to maintaining overall health and wellness, nothing’s hotter right now than the gut. The idea that if we regulate our microbiome—the ecosystem of good and bad bacteria in our gastrointestinal system—we can fully optimize our body’s health is nearly gospel in the wellness world. But in order to take advantage of all of the awesome potential health benefits of a healthy digestive tract, we may have to start rethinking our relationship with sugar. “Imagine our gut as being a garden with flowers, grass and weeds,” says Jacob Wilson, PhD, CSCS, author of The Ketogenic Bible and member of The Vitamin Shoppe Wellness Council. “The gut microbiome contains a garden with good bacteria that helps our body, and bad bacteria that cause inflammation and hunger,” he says. “Sugar selectively feeds the bad bacteria. This means you end up having more weeds than flowers.” (Weeds, in this analogy, meaning bad bacteria.) ad_intervals[‘419300_div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘419300_div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’);}); } }, 100); We all know that sugar is enemy number one of the health world, but how freaked should we be about its effect on our gut? Experts share what you need to know. What we know about sugar and gut health Your gut microbiome is constantly at work to maintain good digestive health—or, you know, keep the grass green and flowers blooming. “Good bacteria in our gut lower inflammation, make us happy, lean, and give us longevity,” he says.
The World’s Largest Hotel Chain Has Decided To Ban Mini Toiletries
August 29, 2019 at 09:30PM A step in the right direction for large brands. Continue Reading… Author Jamie Schneider | Life by Daily Burn Selected by CWC
These Make-Ahead Recipes For Labor Day Weekend Embrace The Last Of Summer Produce
August 29, 2019 at 09:00PM Make sure your Labor Day involves as little labor as possible. Continue Reading… Author Liz Moody | Life by Daily Burn Selected by CWC
If you sit all day long, leg flossing will help take the edge off of tight desk hips
August 29, 2019 at 08:00PM by CWC My legs are always sore and tight, thanks to all the boot camps, running, and dog walking I task them with. I try everything I can to loosen them up, from taking a Theragun to my quads to stretching in every single position—but I’ve never quite been able to shake the feeling of cement-heavy legs post-workout. In the middle of an at-home yoga sesh, though, Los Angeles-based yoga guru Kyle Miller, co-founder of Love Yoga—who just released her own at-home yoga videos—started flowing through what I can only describe as leg flossing. “This is my absolute favorite thing to do—I do it in just about every class, and I’m sure my students are sick of it,” Miller jokes as she walks me through the feels-so-good movement. “It’s such a great position for opening up the joints of the lower body.” If you’ve ever done shoulder flossing—another yoga-based move that I fell in love with recently—you’ll know that anything dubbed “flossing” really brings fluidity to your body (not to mention, it just feels divine). Miller explains to me that her practice is based off of Taoism, which views the body as its own little universe. “We have our own networks of circulation, land masses—organs and muscles—delicate ecosystems, and homeostasis,” she says. “Joints are like bends in the river, places where garbage collects. We want everything to flow, nothing to get caught and create stagnation.” This is exactly why she’s partial to cleaning out, articulating, moving,
A top psychiatrist reveals the brain-boosting nutrient that’s majorly overlooked in our diets
August 29, 2019 at 07:23PM by CWC When it comes to eating for brain health, the focus lands on omega-3s. While it’s true that the fatty acids are 100 percent linked to boosting cognitive health, Well+Good Wellness Council member and Columbia University psychiatrist Drew Ramsey, MD, says a lot of people are forgetting another nutrient that’s majorly good for your brain: vitamin E. “This is one of my absolute favorite nutrients,” Dr. Ramsey shared on Instagram. “Vitamin E is a firefighter. Every second, thousands of ‘fires’ erupt on the surface of your cells, and the dedicated job of vitamin E is to put those fires out,” he explains. “Your brain is particularly vulnerable to fires because it contains high concentrations of omega-3 fats, and these fats are very easy to oxidize.” According to Dr. Ramsey, a whopping 96 percent of people don’t eat enough foods with vitamin E to reach a recommended 15 milligrams daily. Not getting enough can not only lead to impaired cognitive function, but it is also linked to depression. The good news is, there are a lot choices full of the nutrient. ad_intervals[‘419318_div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’] = setInterval(function () { if (ads_ready) { clearTimeout(ad_intervals[‘419318_div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’]); googletag.cmd.push(function(){googletag.display(‘div-gpt-ad-8891272-3’);}); } }, 100); What are the top foods with vitamin E? 1. Avocado Of course, right? Avocado packs a one-two punch when it comes to eating for brain health because it has healthy fats *and* vitamin E. One cup of sliced avocado has 21 percent of the vitamin E daily requirements. There’s a reason