Month: September 2019

September 06, 2019 at 07:00PM by CWC I feel personally victimized by the conceit of this article, which is to point a spotlight on the fact that introversion shouldn’t be called upon as an excuse for being straight-up rude. As someone who’d prefer the guillotine to icebreaker games, “I’m an introvert” is my timeless, grimace-inducing refrain to safeguard me from just about any group gathering that preys on my energy reserves. But though I wouldn’t call myself a social butterfly, I’m also not delusional and do totally realize that many people (me) are guilty of one of the most common introvert problems: unintentionally being disrespectful of other people and their time. But is it possible to lean into your authentic yearnings to honor your JOMO goals without offending everyone you know? Or, in simpler terms, how can I tell the different between being an introvert and being an asshole? “When it comes to being an introvert without being rude, I agree that some people do tend to use being introverted as an excuse,” says clinical psychologist and self-identified introvert Carla Marie Manly, PhD. “In a humorous defense of introverts, extroverts tend to be rude in the same way—not showing up to a party without notice—they just use the ‘I have too much going on’ rather than the introvert card.” Score 1, Team Introvert! “Some people do tend to use being introverted as an excuse…. Extroverts tend to be rude in the same way—not showing up to a party without notice—they

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September 06, 2019 at 06:51PM by CWC Here’s a fun fact: the average doctor visit takes 17.5 minutes. That means you have less than 18 minutes to go over your vital signs (weight, blood pressure, temperature, all that jazz), talk through how you’re feeling, and ask your doctor questions before they have to see another patient waiting in the next exam room. Clearly, it’s not often that people have the chance to pick the brain of a doctor—which is why it’s ultra exciting that Jennifer Haythe, MD, director of cardio-obstetrics and internist at NYPH/Columbia, is sharing an inside look at the things she does to keep her heart in tip-top shape. “Cardiovascular disease is the number one cause of death for men and women in this country,” says Dr. Haythe, who is also the co-director of the Women’s Center for Cardiovascular Health at Columbia. “The key to longevity is to take really great care of your heart.” Dr. Haythe explains that your heart is a muscle and, therefore, like your other muscles, it needs to stay in shape. “It’s also intimately connected with your neurological system,” she says. “So your mood and stress levels have a huge impact on how your heart feels.” So what are the heart health tips that a cardiologist actually lives by? See for yourself, straight from Dr. Haythe. 1. Set exercise goals Dr. Haythe loves to run, and says that setting goals for herself, like signing up for a half or full marathon, helps her

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September 06, 2019 at 03:00PM by CWC It seems that nobody I know is good at setting boundaries in relationships, present or past. When it comes to dating, the effects of this can wreak havoc on social circles, because if you date within your social group, and then break up within your social group, and then remain in your social group, not much else but chaos—internal and external alike—can ensue. Just last week, a friend was lamenting to me about how her ex asked if it would be okay to visit her at a work event mutual friends were attending, and she felt pressured into saying yes “to be nice.” And that, one pro says, is exactly the problem. “You’ve just addressed the major problem most of us have in setting boundaries; we want to be nice,” says relationship expert Susan Winter. “And while that’s a beautiful sentiment, whenever we break our boundaries for the benefit of another, it’s done at our direct expense. Bottom line: This form of ‘being nice’ makes us miserable.” Still, setting boundaries in relationships with exes—and everyone else in your life—is tough because of things like social media, mutual friends, and, often, geography. So how do you deal? Winter shares a few ideas below. 1. Setting boundaries in relationships with exes Pro tip: You don’t have to be rude about it. The best way to approach this is by setting guidelines early and upfront. That’s easier said then done, of course. (Not all of us

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