Year: 2019

February 10, 2019 at 10:30AM by CWC Sometimes, when I know I’m going to have to talk about my mental health with loved ones, I prepare like I’m heading into battle. I load myself up with mantras for calm, consider the facts I need to know, and affix it all like armor to deflect from well-meaning but destructive utterances. So many people don’t have the language for how to talk about this stuff, and it often results in everyone feeling a little bit more terrible than they did before. This year, for instance, I worked through one of the worst depressions of my life—it lasted a year, and I felt as though I was drowning, constantly. Living across the country from most of the people I love means their understanding of my mental space hinges almost entirely on my ability to communicate it in a way they’ll understand—a way that doesn’t make them worry or feel as though they need to say the “right” thing. So, I consulted with my family, friends, and New York-based behavior analyst Makenzie Sandler to figure out how to avoid the seemingly innocuous conversational pitfalls that stop mental health discussions in their tracks. Photo: Getty Images/Klaus Vedfelt Don’t: Offer unsolicited advice This one can be hard, as it feels almost hard-wired into how we as people communicate. But sometimes it does more harm than good. “Most times, the person does not want your advice,” Sandler cautions. “Pause and reflect before you spew out your well-meaning

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